Alternatively called, “People are Stupid.”
So I talked to the life insurance people…finally. A snapshot of the conversation:
ME: I didn’t receive the letter or the form I need to fill out for the rest of the policy payment.
PERSON: That doesn’t make sense.
ME: Well, I got the first check, but not the letter. Can you resend the letter?
PERSON: Why wouldn’t you have it? We sent it to you.
ME: Well, you know the USPS (uncomfortable laugh by me). I got the check, but not the letter. Can you just resend the letter and the form I need to fill out?
PERSON: Well, how did you get the check and not the letter?
ME: Um, I don’t know. Were they sent in the same envelope?
PERSON: Of course not. They were sent a week apart. But if you got one, why wouldn’t you get the other?
ME: Can you just resend the letter and the form?
PERSON: I guess so, but why don’t you have the letter and the form?
ME: I. DON’T. KNOW. CAN YOU JUST RESEND IT?
PERSON: There’s no reason to get upset. I just don’t understand.
ME: Look, I need the letter and the form. You have the letter and the form. I don’t know where the hell that envelope is and frankly, I don’t care. I just need you to resend.
PERSON: Fine. I’ll resend. This just doesn’t make sense. Can I confirm your address? (Repeats address correctly) Well, that’s where we sent it – you got the check, so why don’t you have the letter?
ME: Look, I don’t know. It’s lost. Can you put another copy in the mail and send it to the address you just read to me?
PERSON: Well, I don’t know what good that will do if you aren’t getting your mail.
ME: Then send by FedEx or UPS.
PERSON: Well, we really don’t do that…
ME: And that’s why I don’t have it…
What the hell?! Bets on whether or not I get the letter and form?